Author |
Joys of Marriage |
Tarnekep Grand Admiral Galactic Navy
Joined: October 17, 2003 Posts: 275
| Posted: 2007-06-14 15:47  
Marriage (Part I )
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady, and
after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time
I want -- and I don't expect any hassle from you.
I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless
I tell you that I won't be home for dinner.
I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing
when I want with my old buddies, and don't you
give me a hard time about it.
Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said:
"No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex
here at seven o'clock every night...whether you're here or not."
(DARN SHE'S GOOD!)
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Marriage (Part II)
Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding
anniversary!
The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone
that reads, 'Here Lies My Wife -- Cold As Ever'!"
"Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone
that reads, 'Here Lies My Husband -- Stiff At Last'!"
(HE ASKED FOR IT!)
*****************************************
Marriage (Part III)
Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast
table.
Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no
good in bed either," and storms out of the house.
After some time he realizes he was nasty and
decides to make amends and rings her up.
She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband
says, "What took you so long to answer to the phone?"
She says, "I was in bed."
"In bed this early, doing what?"
"Getting a second opinion!"
(YEP, HE HAD THAT COMING, TOO!)
*****************************************
Marriage (Part IV)
A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement.
He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling his
wife," Mother of Six" in spite of her objections.
One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it IS time to go
home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts
at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home Mother of Six?"
His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion,
shouts right back, "Any time you're ready, Father of Four."
(RIGHT ON, LADY!)
*****************************************
THE SILENT TREATMENT
A man and his wife were having some problems at home
and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly the man realized that the next day he would need his wife
to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on
a piece of paper,"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would
find it.The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it
was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.
Furious, he was about to go to see why his wife hadn't wakened him when
he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM.
Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
*****************************************
God may have created man before woman, but there
is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.
************** ***************************
This should get your fancy lol
have a good laugh everyone
Tarnekep
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Borgie Chief Marshal Pitch Black
Joined: August 15, 2005 Posts: 2256 From: close by
| Posted: 2007-06-14 22:05  
lol funny
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Leonide Grand Admiral Templar Knights
Joined: October 01, 2005 Posts: 1553 From: Newport News, Virginia
| Posted: 2007-06-14 23:26  
lollerskates.
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captain of the ICC Assault Cruiser C.S.S. Sledgehammer
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Little Pet Slinki Admiral
Joined: April 16, 2006 Posts: 836 From: United Kingdom, South West.
| Posted: 2007-06-15 00:03  
That made me fly the rofflecopter.
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Nonthought Cadet
Joined: April 05, 2007 Posts: 65 From: England
| Posted: 2007-06-15 05:56  
Bwahaha!
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Sixkiller Marshal Courageous Elite Commandos
Joined: May 11, 2005 Posts: 1786 From: Netherlands
| Posted: 2007-06-15 07:49  
wonderfull:P
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Enterprise Chief Marshal Raven Warriors
Joined: May 19, 2002 Posts: 2576 From: Hawthorne, Nevada
| Posted: 2007-06-15 08:35  
Women pwn. Nuff said.
-Ent
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Glimmer Fleet Admiral
Joined: February 05, 2006 Posts: 54 From: Hertfordshire
| Posted: 2007-06-15 10:30  
This is a picture of marriage by a unknown artist.
[ This Message was edited by: Glimmer on 2007-06-15 10:31 ]
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