| Author |
The Path Of Solux |
Fatal Rocko Willis
Fleet Admiral
Fatal Squadron
Joined: March 01, 2003
Posts: 1336
From: Kentucky
|  Posted: 2007-11-13 15:23
This is a Sci-Fi story written my by oldest sone best friend... As a writer here he asked me post this here to know what you guys think about it.. I will not post it all as he is working, school and writing. I will post it as I get it... I have not proof read this very much but it looks pretty good. BTW it is in no way related to Darkspace...
Now for your reading enjoyment I present you "The Path Of Solux" by Ian Leach
Chapter 1: The Message is Picked Up
It has been three hours since a distress beacon was picked up. The bounty hunter had only been in the beta region for only nine months, and had already been to a planet that had a civil war among a race called the Shiniro. The entire population was advanced in both space and weapons, and highly advanced. Remembering this made him want to skip the distress beacon and go live with the Shiniro. But, he figured that there would be time for vacations later.
“Please just be a pissed off underpaid employee with a gun…wait.” He said.
Just then he learned that it wasn’t a federation ship. It didn’t register as one and the federation hadn’t even begun to move towards this region.
It was a derelict space frigate above a planet that looked like was ravaged by war. The planet was called Glendactu Prime.
“I hope this isn’t…” He said
He was then cut off by his own surprise as he got out. He looked around and saw no defense turrets. As he walked to the air lock access, he got a glance at the planet. He then walked in.
“That planet must have been beautiful before it looked like that.” He thought.
He then activated the air pressurization sequence. Then he found that it was a Tumarpa ship, the race that had ruined his child hood twelve years ago.
“Tumarpa’s!” He screamed with anger in his voice.
The Tumarpa’s were a highly advanced race both in space travel and weapons, much like the Shiniro. Their goal was to become the dominant ruler of the known universe. What happens to them doesn’t matter, the results count.
As he looked around, he found a computer terminal and hacked into their files. It wasn’t long till a wounded Tumarpa snuck up on him. The Hunter was quick to break its legs. Though they were responsible for what had happened to his childhood, he couldn’t stand by and watch as they suffered. He wasn’t raised like that. “I’m not sorry.” He mumbled.
BAM!
One shot from his cannon ended its suffering. As he resumed checking the computer, he learned that they where doing bio-tech research with a radioactive element known as entrozun. “Hmm…” He thought, “Contact with this stuff would be fatal to subjects under index level S-3. My armor should be good enough.”
Then he heard gun fire as from out of no where. He looked at his radar and saw that no one other than himself was anywhere with fifteen meters. So he checked the map. There was a corridor at the top of the room.
This corridor went to the ships fusion reactor core. That was where the gunfire was coming from. Before he left, a file opened up about infestation within the confines of the ventilation system of the ship. He then moved to the top of the room. “Hmm…” He thought, “It’s going to take some time before I get to the reactor core.”
About two hours later he made it to a freight lift. He was then surprised by two Tumarpa’s. Both critically injured. The hunter quickly dispatched them with some melee techniques.
When he arrived, he looked around. The reactor wasn’t going to stay online for very long. When it goes offline, the ship would initiate an auto self-destruct sequence. The hunter; however, went ahead and set the self-destruct sequence on the computer that was nearby.
While he was busy a Tumarpa had dropped in on him. The hunter knew this was a different Tumarpa, then the previous ones he had encountered. It was an elite! The strongest known Tumarpa’s! His fight was hard and it didn’t go to good for the Tumarpa. It fell into the reactor. It only came out with the top half before falling back in.
This caused the reactor to go offline. This in return tripped the self-destruct sequence. This gave the hunter less than an hour to get away from the ship. But someone else was on the ship. And this is where his trouble begins.
[ This Message was edited by: Father Rocko, Order of the Agincourt on 2007-11-13 15:41 ]
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AdmiralChaos [Vanity]
Cadet
Joined: November 09, 2007
Posts: 11
| Posted: 2007-11-13 15:37
I want moreeeeeeeeee. I like it so far.
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I'm here to take what's mine.
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GothThug {C?}
Fleet Admiral
Joined: June 29, 2005
Posts: 2932
| Posted: 2007-11-13 15:46
more pl0x! 
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Fatal Rocko Willis
Fleet Admiral
Fatal Squadron
Joined: March 01, 2003
Posts: 1336
From: Kentucky
| Posted: 2007-11-13 21:18
Chapter 2: The Enemy Lives Again
As he looked around to find a way out, a surge deactivated a shield around a door. The hunter, knowing that his options were extremely limited, thought, ‘I’ll take it.’ The door led up to the ventilation shafts. As he was moving through the shafts, he recalled the file that mentioned infestation in the ventilation. Then he made it to a cooling piston, there was a problem, another Tumarpa elite.
“Don’t these things ever die?” he said. He killed it with two missiles and left.
“That one was too…easy. And it looked like it was already dieing.” he said to himself.
Later, about three minutes, he came to the freight lift that had brought him down here. The vent cover across the narrow pathway went straight to another vent cover. It then blew off, allowing him to continue on.
“This vent must be for the plasma exhaust that keeps the ships environment stable…weird.” He said aloud. About three more minutes passed before he came to a computer terminal. “Lets see. The access code?” he said.
He then typed in a few letters. Then the ships entire schematic system came up... Click
“Nine minutes until the destruction of the ship. All personnel report to docking bay four.” Announced the computer. “Guess I need to go.” As he ran towards an opened vent, a section of the wall beside him collapsed to the floor. He went through the opening.
It was another corridor.
“Man! This place is like a maze! What the…” He screamed. Just then, two gun turrets opened fire on him. “Wow, I’m out of missiles, my guns overheated, and I’m stuck. Just great.” he said while hiding behind the wall.
Boom! Boom! Clank…
“What the hell?” The hunter then looked behind the wall, and saw a girl that looked somewhat familiar to him. She was holding a pulse cannon.
“You are?” asked the hunter who was pinned down. “I’m Elizabeth Fowler. Who the hell are you?” She said. “I’m Solux, nice to meet you…I guess.” he said. They shook hands and left.
“Four minutes until the destruction of the ship, all personnel report to docking bay four…” announced the computer.
Solux then got a message and his com link opened up and the person on the other side spoke. “You know the ships blowing up.”
“Can we talk later?” Solux said in a firm tone. The officer closed the link.
“So, you’re with the federation?” asked Elizabeth.
Solux replied with an annoyed tone. “Yes. And it’s not like I trust you just because you know what it is.”
Elizabeth stopped and spoke in a disgusted tone of voice, “Excuse me? I thought I just saved your ass back there?”
“Come on!” Solux said as he grabbed her by the hand.
Solux was hoping that he would be able to save the girl that he was starting know, and to repay his debt to her. With only one minute to spare, they finally got to the docking bay where Elizabeth’s ship was hit by a large piece of debris.
“No!” she said falling to her knees.
“Come on! We can take my ship.” Solux said picking her up.
As they were getting in Solux’s ship, they saw a portion of the ship fall off and burst into pieces. Then they saw something fly out of the flames that were still alive. It resembled a wingless dragon-with armor plating. Solux remembered the dragon that he had encountered when he helped the ^$!^!$^#iro in their three way struggle. That’s when he was pulled back into reality by Elizabeth.
“Get in!” She screamed.
As he looked up, he saw that some debris was hurtling towards him. So he jumped in and jetted his ship away from the docking bay. They were heading towards Glendactu Prime. This little trip wasn’t going to be good for either one of them.
Upon entry, the ship was hit by debris and the dragon. Everyone that has seen the dragon has never forgotten his cry or the sound his body made when flying. The entire universe trembled at the name of Cunno-Lokka.
This was one of Solux’s enemies, one at least.
“Elizabeth, get down now!” Solux said, covering Elizabeth’s body with his own.
Crash! Boom! Bang! Boom!
“Ah!!!” Elizabeth and Solux screamed.
This is where they are trapped by an inescapable destiny. Their worst nightmare has just begun.
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Banshee
Grand Admiral
Raven Warriors
Joined: August 28, 2001
Posts: 2181
From: Philadelphia, PA
| Posted: 2007-11-14 04:27
Its very good, though a little vague.
If he is after sending it off to a publisher as a novel, could use alot more details in the interactions etc.
"the hunter quickly dispatched them with some melee techniques" little vague.
Very good read though, guy has talent.
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Fatal Rocko Willis
Fleet Admiral
Fatal Squadron
Joined: March 01, 2003
Posts: 1336
From: Kentucky
| Posted: 2007-11-14 06:14
Yeah Banshee... I agree, it needs to be cleaned up a bit.... This is the kids first try at writing a story...
Not bad for a 16 year old kid I suppose....
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GothThug {C?}
Fleet Admiral
Joined: June 29, 2005
Posts: 2932
| Posted: 2007-11-14 15:19
omgbbq! nice 2nd Chapter...cant wait for moar XD
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Lark of Serenity
Grand Admiral
Raven Warriors
Joined: June 02, 2002
Posts: 2516
| Posted: 2007-11-14 21:58
"The bounty hunter had only been in the beta region for only nine months,"
not just only, but ONLY. saying it twice doesnt make it any more definite =P
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Admiral Larky, The Wolf
Don't play with fire, play with Larky.
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Lacrosseian
Fleet Admiral
Raven Warriors
Joined: October 01, 2004
Posts: 1254
| Posted: 2007-11-14 22:17
Quote:
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On 2007-11-14 21:58, N'kra The Wolf wrote:
"The bounty hunter had only been in the beta region for only nine months,"
not just only, but ONLY. saying it twice doesnt make it any more definite =P
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You tell those high schoolers...
I am sorry I have nothing really to add tot his discussion...
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