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News Release {UGTO} (4-8-08) |
Kanman Grand Admiral Pitch Black
Joined: August 26, 2005 Posts: 1017 From: Virginia, United States
| Posted: 2008-04-08 15:49  
UGTO High Command has released a news of a new stardard in training for its officers. This new standard was derived from a veteran's means of survival.
A decade ago, a UGTO vessel was sabotaged by one of the earliest ICC rebels. Their food supply (mostly bacon) was vented into space, in hopes that the crew would starve to death before making back port. They would have starved, however the UGTO security detail found this ICC rebel and 14 other rebels. An exact quote from the commanding officer: "Let them become the bacon which they have destroyed."
And so the crew made it home safely, having consumed the rebels. In modern times, the UGTO High Command has found many recently trained officers to be 'soft', letting the enemy flee when crippled and sparing the lives of traitors spying on our worlds. To release a new batch of truly hardened officers to lead in a new wave of UGTO might, all new officers must consume the flesh of a captured ICC rebel at the graduation ceremony. Grand Admiral Kanman, head of the academy's graduation ceremony this month, stated beforehand "They really do taste better when the food is still alive. Cooking dulls the flavor of their fear." For this reason, this first occation of ICC-consumption at graduation was done with still-living rebels.
A few civilian groups protested this new method of training, calling it horrid and inhumane. However, since their initial protests, we have been incapable of finding any of the protesters. We can only assume they have come to accept this new method as 'what is best for the empire'.
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Fattierob Vice Admiral
Joined: April 25, 2003 Posts: 4059
| Posted: 2008-04-08 15:51  
What did the cannibal get when he was late for dinner?
The cold shoulder.
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Xpli$it Marshal
Joined: March 06, 2004 Posts: 486 From: Canada
| Posted: 2008-04-08 16:12  
And to think we let saturns station live today
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Bardiche Chief Marshal
Joined: November 16, 2006 Posts: 1247
| Posted: 2008-04-08 17:57  
The crew of the UGTO Command Dreadnought, "Bardiche", would like to state that they disagree with the views of the UGTO High Council and would like to appeal this decision to be reviewed and reconsidered.
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Eledore Massis [R33] Grand Admiral Templar Knights
Joined: May 26, 2002 Posts: 2695 From: tsohlacoLocalhost
| Posted: 2008-04-08 18:22  
Lucky this is only for officers that come out of the General UGTO recruiting.
Officers that where trained inside the private fleet enterprises don't have to do that.
At least i hope the other UGTO fleets won't adopt this for there officer trainings
But i just hope this won't become a internal struggle between the individual Fleets and the UGTO High command, about standards of there officers training.
_________________ DS Discordion
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Sardaukar Admiral Raven Warriors
Joined: October 08, 2002 Posts: 1656
| Posted: 2008-04-08 19:28  
This is just more proof that the UGTO leadership has been supplanted with shapeshifting reptilian overlords, probably from Alpha Draconis.
Either that, or the UGTO is turning to the K'luth for new ways to outcrazy the enemy. The Bug's were doing this decades ago, and look at their success.
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deathblave Marshal
Joined: October 10, 2007 Posts: 268
| Posted: 2008-04-08 22:41  
utgo carrier dread hellfire and its crew are refuseing to install or think about useing this horrid act of insanity and if it is seen me and my crews will kill captured icc ship to spare them or aid them to escape this new insanity of war think of all utgo who were spared in ambushes i plead all utgo officeres disregaurd this insanity!!!!!! signed deathblave1 of the hellfire and a shard of sanity.
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DMC-13 Admiral Evil Empires Inc.
Joined: February 16, 2008 Posts: 187 From: Huntington Beach, California, USA
| Posted: 2008-04-09 00:16  
Wow, that is definitely bent, broken and twisted.
DMC-13
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Deltabacon Fleet Admiral
Joined: August 17, 2007 Posts: 395 From: Liverpool, Great Britain
| Posted: 2008-04-09 00:54  
*burp*
whats all this fuss about this then?
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Drafell Grand Admiral Mythica
Joined: May 30, 2003 Posts: 2449 From: United Kingdom
| Posted: 2008-04-09 02:03  
Farstar burger, anyone?
_________________ It's gone now, no longer here...Yet still I see, and still I fear.rnrn
rnrn
DarkSpace Developer - Retired
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FlyD4wn Fleet Admiral
Joined: October 19, 2004 Posts: 138 From: Netherlands
| Posted: 2008-04-09 02:18  
Quote:
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On 2008-04-08 16:12, Fatal Xpli$it wrote:
And to think we let saturns station live today
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Indeed..
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Xpli$it Marshal
Joined: March 06, 2004 Posts: 486 From: Canada
| Posted: 2008-04-09 11:40  
Quote:
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On 2008-04-09 02:18, Fatal FlyD4wn wrote:
Quote:
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On 2008-04-08 16:12, Fatal Xpli$it wrote:
And to think we let saturns station live today
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Indeed..
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The crew were probably too busy devouring the crew on ben1992's ship when he was trapped by Saturns tractors to WH out to safety.
Blood thirsty fiends! ICC will retaliate!
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Fattierob Vice Admiral
Joined: April 25, 2003 Posts: 4059
| Posted: 2008-04-09 11:55  
Quote:
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On 2008-04-09 02:03, Drafell wrote:
Farstar burger, anyone?
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I wonder what the topics on that would be.
Rebelious Ketchsup?
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Sardaukar Admiral Raven Warriors
Joined: October 08, 2002 Posts: 1656
| Posted: 2008-04-09 13:41  
Quote:
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On 2008-04-09 11:55, Fattierob wrote:
Quote:
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On 2008-04-09 02:03, Drafell wrote:
Farstar burger, anyone?
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I wonder what the topics on that would be.
Rebelious Ketchsup?
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Kapteyn's Catsup
Heinz*36 (Or CD*57)
Condiment Carrier
Pickle Destroyer
McGuppy and Fries
Taufu Burgers (from Tau Ceti, get it?)
Tabasco MDs
And for anyone who has eaten at White Castle... Assault Sliders. Jump and Missile may fit too.
[ This Message was edited by: Sardaukar on 2008-04-09 13:48 ]
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Coeus Grand Admiral Sundered Weimeriners
Joined: March 22, 2006 Posts: 2815 From: Philly
| Posted: 2008-04-09 17:50  
BUWAHHAHAHAHA Sard! You twisted wacked out person...
_________________ Do I really look like a guy with a plan?
'I'm gonna go crazy, and I'm taking you with me!'
ICC Security Council Chief Enforcer
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